Does Virginia have Jurisdiction for your divorce?
In suits for annulment, affirmance, or divorce, the county or city in which the parties last cohabited, or at the option of the plaintiff, in the county or city in which the defendant resides, if a resident of this Commonwealth, and in cases in which an order of publication may be issued against the defendant under § 8.01-316, venue may also be in the county or city in which the plaintiff resides.
If you have minor children living with your spouse in another state for over six months then you should consider filing in that state as that court has jurisdiction over the children. Your spouse can waive that jurisdiction in writing.
You should file the divorce in the county where you presently reside, or in the County where your spouse resides, if she lives in another County. You or your spouse must have a Virginia address in the county where you are filing your divorce. Virginia civilian residents living overseas may file in Virginia if they have maintained their residency in Virginia.